How yoga helped me: a nursing story

There are a large number of caregivers helping people all over the world. Those in the UK are approaching 7 million.

According to Carers UK there are threeof five peoplewill be a caregiver at some point in our lives. Here I share my experiences as a caregiver and how yoga has helped me overcome the most difficult times.

Become a caregiver

A few years ago I was caring for a loved one who developed debilitating and devastating depression. As a primary care physician, I hear hundreds of patient stories about depression; the symptoms of hopelessness and helplessness, agitation, rumination, insomnia, suicidal thoughts. Although I had heard it all before, I had never experienced such mental anguish firsthand, so close to home - so constant, cruel and debilitating.

I went into full action mode: diving headfirst into the fight against a disease I thought I knew so well. I arrogantly believed that I would find the answers to solve this problem. I researched different therapies and specialists, pinned my hopes on more and more medications, implemented every intervention I could think of from changing diet, exercise and micromanaging everyday life. I was thinking about moving us out of town to get a dog. Yes, I have even tried yoga and meditation on someone without will or energy. No matter what I did, nothing seemed to help.

Life has changed. Months turned into years and the depression was constant, ever-present. I was constantly afraid of what new misery might come next and prepared every day to fight new crises. Unable to escape the caring role at home or at work, I developed signs of compassion fatigue—I was exhausted, irritable, and disconnected, incapable of empathy or usefulness.

A definition ofCompassion Fatigue (Merriam-Webster Dictionary):

"The physical and mental exhaustion and emotional withdrawal experienced by those who care for sick or traumatized people for extended periods of time. Unlike burnout, which is caused by everyday work stress, compassion fatigue results from taking on the emotional burden of a patient's agony."

Yoga as refuge, friend and teacher

During this time I began a two-year yoga teacher training course. Looking back, I only now realize how fortunate it was to immerse myself in it. There are so many ways yoga held me tight and threw me a lifeline during the years I was nurturing.

The permission to do something other than care was huge. Being on the mat became my self-care. I left the house to attend classes, connected with a yoga community full of kind souls, and spent as much time laughing as I did crying. And of course the body, breathing and meditation practices helped in and of themselves - magically calming a mind and body that was full of guilt, anger, resentment and sadness.

Yoga philosophy became a living practice. So many of the lessons spoke directly to me—like song lyrics that cut deep in moments of heartbreak, I absorbed them. One day, when I was frustrated that I had missed class, my teacher assured me, “You are doing your yoga bynotcome to class today.’ I realized for the first time that the practice of love, kindness and caring is right there yoga in action.

The inner work of yoga has helped me overhaul my psychology – building acceptance and opening up new perspectives on a transformed life. By cultivating calmness, I tried not to desperately hold on to the good days and resist the bad. I stopped turning to yoga as a simple escape and found myself in pain, in and out. By looking within, I opened my heart little by little to everything that was unfolding and let go of my fears. Somehow, fresh compassion and empathy that had been lost over the years resurfaced, as did joy.

An excerpt from(link removed)

"The alternative is to enjoy life rather than cling to it or push it away. If you can live like this, every moment will change you. If you are willing to experience the gift of life rather than struggle with it, you will be moved to the depths of your being. When you reach this state, you will begin to realize the secrets of the heart. The heart is a place through which energy flows to sustain you. This energy inspires you and uplifts you. It is the strength that carries you through life'

One day I stopped trying to be a savior. I realized that I needed to care, not heal, and understood that it was not my sole responsibility to fix something or someone. I tried to love unconditionally and, remarkably, discovered that this was more than enough.

Through yoga practice, I got out of my own way and saw paths to action emerge with more clarity. Like all of life's challenges, this care gave me the gift of personal and spiritual growth. And even though I was forever a work in progress, I became a better caregiver and hopefully a better doctor.

My tips for carers

• Erkenne Sie sind eine Pflegekraft. Betreuer werden oft nicht gesehen und gehört. Sie betrachten sich möglicherweise nicht als Pflegeperson, weil Sie dies in Ihrer Verantwortung übernehmen oder eher emotionale als physische oder praktische Unterstützung leisten. Im Vereinigten Königreich sind rund 1,5 Millionen unbezahlte Pflegekräfte im Bereich der psychischen Gesundheit tätig. Erkenne, was du für einen anderen Menschen tust.
• Schrei Lass dich weinen, bemitleide dich selbst und lass alle Emotionen aufsteigen und lass sie raus. Haben Sie schon einmal in Savasana geweint? Ich auch, und es ist in Ordnung.
• Gut genug Sie können nicht mehr als Ihr Bestes tun. Hören Sie auf, sich selbst die Schuld zu geben, und wissen Sie, dass es in Ordnung ist, Grenzen zu setzen. Grenzen sind der Schlüssel, um ein Ausbrennen zu vermeiden.
• Bitte um Hilfe Du musst nicht alleine sein. Menschen sind bemerkenswert und werden Sie immer wieder mit ihrer Freundlichkeit überraschen. Wenn Sie fragen, können Sie Kraft und Unterstützung an Orten finden, von denen Sie nicht wussten, dass sie existieren – Freunde, Familie, Arbeitskollegen oder andere Betreuer, die wissen, was Sie durchmachen.
• Meine Zeit. Weil Sie es brauchen und verdienen. Laut dem UK State of Caring Report 2019 von Carer konzentrieren sich 64 % der Pflegenden nicht auf ihre eigenen Bedürfnisse. Und meine Zeit bedeutet nicht nur, dich um dich zu kümmern Basic Vergessen Sie nicht die Dinge, die Ihnen Freude bereiten, und verbringen Sie Zeit an diesem Ort, wann immer Sie können.
• Hab Vertrauen Die schlimmsten Zeiten werden nicht ewig dauern. Nimm Zuflucht in den ruhigen Momenten, die kommen. Und erlaube dir – schau einfach, ob du kannst – dem Universum und der Entfaltung dessen zu vertrauen, was sein wird.
• Praktiziere Yoga Nimm aus deiner Praxis, was du kannst – Auszeit, Bewegung, Meditation, Ruhe, Gemeinschaft. Wisse, dass Yoga wirklich mehr umfasst als körperliche Praxis – etwas, das ich lange Zeit nicht richtig zu schätzen wusste. Es gibt Reichtum und Weisheit in seinen Lehren, wenn du dich ihnen öffnest, die dein Leben verändern können.

For nursing staff support and information:

https://carers.org/

(link removed)

https://carers-network.org.uk/

Mental health support: https://www.mind.org.uk/information-support/helping-someone-else/carers-friends-family-coping-support/am-ia-carer/