My journey to motherhood: received in his mid -30s

I never paid much attention to my period, except what a nuisance they were. How many women I spent the first two days of my menstrual cycle with pain and clung to my hot water bottle to be relieved. More recently, my periods have received a different meaning - I think more about them. Every period now feels like a loss. A missed opportunity to create life, a feeling of failure and deep disappointment. It is strange, but they spend their whole young adult life in being afraid of their fertility, worrying about getting pregnant, and when they finally want to become a mother, find that it is not as easy as they thought or were made. The irony is bitter.

I am a 36-year-old woman and yoga teacher and live in England-shortly before 37-and I can hear this ticking watch: it is like a constant sum in the background of my mind. Sometimes the feeling of urgency can feel everything consuming. I knew I always wanted to have a family, but how many working women was busy concentrating on my career. It took me a while to find out what I wanted to do. Career change in my late 20s become a personal trainer and fitness trainer and finally focused on becoming a full-time yoga practitioner. At the beginning of 2020 I finally reached a place where I felt stable. I lived with my fiance, who was supposed to get married in September and I had a steady stream of work. All of my ducks were in their proverbial rows.

Then Covid-19 met and everything changed.

My work stopped abruptly (and has dramatically reduced since March last year) how many couples during pandemic, my fiance and I decided to move our wedding instead of having a virtual wedding. All plans went out of the window. In view of the stress and uncertainty that pandemic brings with it, it was simply not the right time to think about starting a family. When I had my birthday last April, I couldn't ignore that my window was gradually narrowing for a baby. Whether it was the right time or not, I could no longer put it on ice - pandemic or no pandemic.

It is no secret that fertility decreases with increasing age women's health , “ (link removed) ”. This is because the number and quality of the eggs decreases and thus “ (link removed) ”.

The best way I could master is to share my story in safe places and listen to it (link away). This also has fertility problems. And as a colored woman (I have South American heritage) I sat there and looked at Oprah's interview with Megan Markle and Prince Harry How many people were sad about their own miscarriage and the stories they told: their discussions with the royal family about the skin color of their son Archie. My fiance is black and we had to overcome racism and disapproval of our own relationship. We have already discussed how we will raise our children who will be mixed breeds and the challenges we have to face. This is another lens, another level on which I also have to navigate on my way to motherhood.

like a colored woman who reads bipoc women fight hyper-fertile stereotypes while looking for help and (link removed) that some faces have a lot to do due to the high costs of the treatments. Although I am not looking for treatment at the moment, these statistics are of course difficult to grasp. Like many women looking for answers on the Internet, I would turn into online searches and become anxious. Then I turn to my own yoga practice.

A basic yoga practice for fertility:

As a yoga and mindfulness teacher, I understand the effects of stress on body and mind too well. More than ever, I have to embody what I teach by prioritizing my self -care through daily meditation, regular exercise, therapy, relaxing yoga and friendly actions towards myself. When I feel overwhelmed, I remember to take a step back. Pause. And breathe. I find a comfortable seat and close my eyes. I feel my feet on the floor, put my hands on my lower abdomen and deliberately breathe into my hands to invite space into this place in me that has the potential to create life. I remember that everything will be fine. I turn to this simple yoga practice whenever I need it, sometimes several times a day, and she always consoles me.

If you read this while looking for answers to fertility, you know that you are not alone. There are people out there who go through exactly what they are. And when Mother's Day comes closer and spring is at the door, they remain hopeful and inspired by the women who have erected them in difficult times like this. The seeds of life sprout, the sun begins to shine again. There is hope. You can bring yoga and mindfulness closer to this connection to yourself.

Some important things for self -care that help me to slow down and connect me to myself:

(link away) - I love to light candles or burn frankincense to change my mood and promote a feeling of positivity and Calm.

Skin & Tonic the Calm Kit - part of my self -care is the care of my skin. I like to spoil myself with a facial mask, rub an essential oil or balm on my temples or treat me to a mini face massage while I rub my nightly moisturizing cream to relax and relax before going to bed.

Yogamatter's organic cotton eye cushion -a must for my restorative yoga practice. The subtle weight and the darkness not only help to switch off the nervous system, but also the subtle sending of lavender promotes relaxation.