The God complex in therapy counseling

The God complex in therapy counseling

Abstract:

What does your patient (customer) expect from you? Their lives are in turmoil, problems are rising from the sky and landing right at their feet, and they need answers. Here the therapist runs the risk of becoming everything to him, father figure, sexual object, confessor, advisor and, above all, the only person who has ever really listened and understood him! In this article, we will explore the dangers for both therapists and clients when both parties begin to see the therapist as a God - who knows everything - sees everything - understands everything, a being who will magically magic away all those terrible feelings and leave a well-adjusted happy person behind.

Introduction:

Since therapists began in the early 19th century, patients have idolized their doctors as special among all the people they know, male or female, it doesn't matter, but the relationship structure of the powerless under the spell of the powerful. Freud and others recognized that patients often transfer their needy feelings to the therapist (counselor) in the form of a love object. Most actually find, after some time in therapy, that their feelings for the therapist diminish to respect or caring, but not as intensely as in the early sessions. This bell-shaped emotion diagram shows early distrust of dependence, through eventual codependency, and finally detachment from the caregiver to an independent, self-supporting state of mind. Of course, these same therapists have recognized that dependence works in reverse in the countertransference, where the therapist becomes dependent on the patient (client) and experiences the detachment anxiously and as a loss.

In order for therapists to deal with the problem, sophisticated rules have been developed by societies over the years and expressed as behavioral boundaries (ethics). In these rules, the therapist should be aware of transference in both directions and deal with the situation through gentle rejection and reassurance to the client that these feelings are normal and will pass. However, for many therapists and clients, these intense emotional feelings do not always go away and ethical boundaries are crossed by the therapist who allows their need for worship and god-like treatment to cloud their judgment for the patient's well-being and further-going treatment.

God like worship

What causes the therapist to slip so easily into the God complex? One definition is that the therapist himself has a needy personality from childhood. Where perhaps from a large family of siblings, where parents must share the available love - where competition for attention often leads to frustration and feelings of aloneness, even in a home surrounded by others. As adults, they often look for people who give in nature to satisfy their need for attention, which was unfortunately missing in childhood. So, when confronted with an attentive client, the therapist may find themselves feeding on their loving adoration and enjoying the client's attention, adoration, which allows the therapist to feel powerful, loved and, most importantly, needed.

A second area is the therapist's self-esteem. The therapist may feel that he is not meeting his own professional standards, that he is letting his clients down through his lack of knowledge and professionalism, and so is constantly looking for clients who will reassure them through their godlike worship that they are doing a good job. that they manage to feel better. The therapist constantly asks the client questions such as “Are you feeling better?”, “Have things improved?” and “Does this session help you?” These are all real questions that every therapist should ask from time to time to check or measure progress, but asking them too often can indicate that the therapist is looking for recognition or praise for the work done so far. In other words, they want to hear that they are doing a good job for the customer. Here the therapist's self-esteem can be strengthened and help him to continue treating clients with newfound self-confidence. This confidence is only temporary, however, as self-doubt creeps back in over time and the client needs further reassurance to bring the ego back to its godlike heights. If a particular client continually praises the therapist, then the therapist in turn creates a need for that client that makes it imperative that they continue treatment. To achieve this, the therapist is constantly looking for new reasons to continue the sessions not for the sake of the client, but for the sake of his own needs.

A third area is professional snobbery, here the therapist must maintain a good reputation, a need for recognition both by the client as an expert and by the admiring public for his or her outstanding work or achievement. Here the therapist becomes the center of the counseling process, magnanimous in his divine status among colleagues and in public. This dangerous self-aggrandizement can lead to recklessness on the part of patients who believe that this person is the all-knowing God catering to their need to be treated by the best - the one with the excellent reputation among their peers - the therapist who it is difficult to see (get an appointment with) because they are so busy and in demand. Of course, the same therapist has to pay the highest fees, and so the client perceives that he is getting the best because he is paying the most.

The crisis trap

Every therapist is aware of the trap of transference and countertransference and, despite this knowledge, can be drawn into an unhealthy situation, even without knowing what is happening, until a crisis arises in which patient and therapist meet at the crossroads of an emotional abyss, where decisions are made about the continuation of the therapy itself and the detachment from those emotions that have so quietly crept up are considered. In this situation, the therapist has the difficult task of repairing the relationship by either moderating his or her own reactions to the client or recommending that the client see a new therapist. However, for the therapist addicted to the client's attention, this is a difficult decision - to send away the very person who gives him the need that he also attracted. For some therapists, there are other concerns, such as being found out, a professional complaint, accidental family interference, or a crisis of confidence in their own counseling skills. This can lead to a fear response that impacts other clients' sessions and outcomes. A therapist in an emotional crisis cannot effectively help clients if they are more concerned with their own well-being than that of the patient.

Results

Is it so surprising that as therapists we need love and attention less than anyone else, to have needs met, to feel wanted and valued by others? Therefore, it is not surprising that, given the opportunity to feel worshiped in a god-like manner, so many therapists fall from grace and fall into the trap of hero worship by the very clients they should be caring for and helping them grow, deal with their own (the clients') real life problems, and move forward to cope with life.

There is no easy solution to this transference phenomenon and offering a simple guide to avoid the situation would be futile as each situation presents different dynamics that each therapist must address and deal with as professionally as possible. However, it would be unfair not to point out some obvious rules of thumb for therapists who succumb to God worship, at least for reflection.

As soon as you as a therapist realize that boundaries have been crossed, a general discussion with a professional colleague can help to confirm his or her personal perspective about yourself and the affected client. Second, the therapist should consider breaking with the client and thus ending the unhealthy situation by recommending another therapist (usually of the same gender as the client). Third, if the transference is one-sided (from the client only), then explaining to the client the reasons for their feelings towards the therapist and how in counseling an inverted bell-like pattern of emotions can be viewed as a healthy progression through the stages of the therapist's sessions towards a healing process at the end. This mutual respect is a far more healthy outcome than god-like worship, which can actually influence the outcome of treatment. Taking the “I’m OK – Your OK” position that both parties involved in the transfer must be met and these needs must be acknowledged, but within the boundaries of good ethical practice. Fourth, recognize that being appreciated by the client for one's work is a worthwhile reward, but that there are limits to this praise that must be colored with realism regarding the therapist's role in counseling as a guide rather than a deity for the client to worship.

Conclusion:

I began this essay to warn therapists about the transference trap and how having clients adore you and hold you in unnaturally high regard can become addictive. That it is natural for all people, not just therapists, to seek love, have needs met, and feel wanted. However, therapists are unique in our society in that they must be trusted to adhere to boundaries and professional standards when providing treatment to vulnerable clients who are often in dire need of answers to their problematic lives, in an atmosphere of trust, respect and humanity from which magic can be expected from the client, but realism and genuine support and understanding is the real magic that therapy offers the client.

END…

Alternative practitioner psychotherapy

The best place to find alternative practitioners psychotherapy is in our free alternative practitioner directory. To view all alternative psychotherapy practitioners, please click here.